Image courtesy: © Thinkstock
Not all men have the gift of the gab. There are some who are born talkers, and you’ll usually find them selling soap, cars or campaign promises. The other kind—the stoic, prudent, silent type—can be found leading by example, or writing a column in a popular fortnightly supplement for women, or suspect in a number of serial killings, sometimes all three at once!
But whether a salesman, politician, column writer or serial killer, there are certain things that all men find hard to say…
1. I love you
This most clichéd of clichés has been thrown around carelessly by teenagers with questionable levels of maturity and guys—also with questionable levels of maturity—just itching to get laid. But really meaning it? It’s the kind of statement that gets our hearts racing, our palms sweating, and our minds wondering: “Will she say it too?”, “Will she just say thank you?”, “Didn’t that happen on Friends?” Ultimately, it’s just blurted out at the unlikeliest of moments, like when India wins the final, he opens his birthday gift and it’s a PS3, or the meal was that good.
2. This isn’t working out
This one probably tops the list. Men generally shy away from bringing up relationship issues, especially this quiet relationship killer. The reason doesn’t matter. All that matters is not making a big deal of it. And not letting her cry. It’s a man’s inability to handle tears that makes it the best offence a woman has against him. Men have stayed in relationships for years just out of the fear of having to be the one to initiate a break-up.
3. That doesn’t look good on you
We’re no experts in the fashion or hair departments, and we’ve never pretended to be. So we’re not quite sure what you mean when you ask us, “Does this suit me?” You’re bound to get a positive answer even if you’re wearing a barrel held in place with suspenders. This is partly because, who knows, maybe that does suit you; and partly because we’re truly afraid of the backlash in the wake of our dissent.
4. I need some space
When you’re in a relationship, it’s expected that you’re supposed to want to spend every waking moment with your better half and every sleeping moment next to her too. But while many agree with the benefits of spending some time apart, no one seems to advertise it very well. While women have found ways of making space for themselves—men rarely realise ‘that time of the month’ comes twice a month—men find it hard to say they just need some alone time, or some time with the boys.
5. I don’t like hanging out with your friends
So we’ve taken you out with our friends only to get popcorn in your hair, beer in your lap and the odd splotch of ketchup on your shirt. And then you ask us to join your friends for a more civilised dinner. We shouldn’t have an issue with it. But, sometimes, all we’re looking for is a relaxed night out with familiar faces—which none of your friends seem to have. It’s not that they’re horrible people. It’s just that if we got along, they’d be our friends by now.
6. Yes. You’re right
Handling egos in a relationship is a tough job. And when it’s coupled with an argument, the ship can sway any which way. We’ll admit it: we’re wrong most of the time. But being wrong so often can take its toll on our egos. And that’s probably when we find it hardest to say, “You’re right.” So once in a while, allow us a silent acknowledgement of defeat. It would mean a lot to us.